Tag Archive for 'ultraviolence'

Book Review: Dead Mann Walking by Stefan Petrucha

Sometimes I get nostalgic for the past. Back in the days when men were men, women were women, and zombies were just shuffling dead things under the command of evil voodoo priests. Yep! Things were simple then. A voodoo priest would slip their victim some good old zombie potion, make sure the victim was buried with several spiders, and then dig up the result several days later, preferably hours after it screamed itself hoarse and turned its fingers to hamburger scratching at the lid of its coffin, buried deep under the ground. What could be more easy? Now things are all complicated.

In fact, today’s zombies are full-on politicized. In today’s world, it’s no longer sufficient to simply be a zombie. You have to crave brains, be a symbol of mindless consumerism, a walking pin-cushion for the human race, an unthinkable scientific experiment gone horribly out of control, a house and home for various social ills, an easy personification of moral decay, or maybe even the very end of the world as we know it. Horrifying death without malice. I don’t really know how zombies can take all this pressure. To tell you the truth, sometimes I think they don’t exactly wear it gracefully. Let’s talk about the zombies in this book:

  • Zombies created by: New technology that reanimates the dead.
  • Fast or Slow: Kind of slow and with bad memories.
  • Killing zombies requires: Decapitation, maybe. Probably need to burn.
  • Zombies are hungry for humans: Only when they “go feral”
  • Zombies make more zombies: No
  • The rest of the world: Basically went back to business as if nothing happened.
  • Voodoo: No
  • Lots of gore: Yep

I have to mention here that I thought Stefan Petrucha’s last book, Blood Prophecy (review here), was a great read.

In this book, a technology corporation came up with a way to restore animation (and probably soul) to dead bodies. The good news is that the zombies get something of their personalities and memories back from before they died. The bad news is that their memories are unreliable, their bodies are in bad shape and continue to degrade, and eventually the zombies “go feral.” This means that they degrade to the point where they start craving brains, or whatever. Our hero Hessius Mann is a zombie who was wrongly convicted and executed for murdering his wife. When the mistake was discovered by the state, Mann was revived. Seeing as how he was a policeman before he died, he became a private detective as a zombie.

Yes I said private detective. This means that the private detective genre (please refer to this article for a detailed description) gets mixed in here as well. So Mann is hired by a normie (a.k.a. liveblood) who wants to track down a zombie and things get much more messy after that. Multiple attempts are made on his life, he falls for a femme fatale, a rich gangster gets involved, and all the other tropes of the genre come into play.

The zombies in this book are politicized in that they are the untouchables of this dystopian futuristic society. As untouchables, they are rejected and marginalized by the normies in the book. The police not only look away while zombies are brutalized by gangs of bored hicks, but if one of the hicks gets hurt, the police join in against the zombies. Zombies aren’t tolerated in expensive neighborhoods, and etc. Sadly, the zombies are no longer capable of living normal lives and so they end up being powerless to avoid fulfilling their own stereotype. Actually, before you get even halfway through the book, the list of social ills portrayed really starts to weigh down the story.

So yeah, we have here a heavily-politicized zombie fiction pulp detective novel that takes place in a dystopian future. It’s like having a chocolate-flavored pumpkin pie served on a steak with hollandaise sauce. Maybe it’s going to be your thing, and maybe it isn’t. I ended up being reminded of Richard K. Morgan’s extremely annoying Th1rte3n. The good news is that this book kicks the shit out of Th1rte3n. For one thing, it has a sense of humor.

Creepy Factor: 1 out of 5
Suspense Factor: 3 out of 5
Weird Erotic Tension Factor: 1 out of 5 (leathery zombie stripper anyone?)
Funny and/or Strange Factor: 3 out of 5 (leathery zombie stripper anyone?)

Final result: There’s something about books where the main characters live under the boot of a dystopian society, and it’s something I might be tired of. This books has its up and downs. The ending, though, is amazingly suspenseful. If you like pulp detective fiction and zombies, this book may be exactly what you’re looking for.

Dead Mann Walking by Stefan Petrucha ROC Books (a division of Penguin)2011

Dead Mann Walking on Amazon

Thanks to the author for sending me a copy of this book to review. See you all next time!

Monster Alphabet: S is for Sock Monkey

Sock Monkey Monster

Some deluded people think sock monkeys are cute. That sock monkeys are safe and kitschy. I assure you that the reality is much, much more horrible than your puny brain can comprehend. (via) (original on etsy)

THE
SOCK MONKEYS
WANT YOUR
EYES

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* Search for Shudder Pulps on eBay *

Sequels and Second Novels

I’ve got a terrible revue backlog, so the time has come to do some quickies. Coincidentally, most of what we have here today are sequels and second novels.

Bloody Red Baron by Kim NewmanAs it follows pretty much the same central characters as Anno Dracula, but occurs 30 years later, there are a lot of similarities between Anno and Bloody Red Baron. The book is very readable. Set in an alt-historical World War I being fought with Dracula himself goading the Kaiser, a parade of real historical figures and fictional luminaries make cameos or serve as main characters. Included in the bunch are Edgar Allan Poe (here eschewing his middle name and living the unfortunate life of a Kafka character), the Mata Hari, Count Orlok, Manfred von Richthofen, and the Baron’s brother, Lothar. There is no Genevieve Dieudonne, sadly. As with Anno Dracula, the plot is meandering and sometimes seems headed nowhere. In Anno, this meandering supplied more delicious background. In Bloody Red Baron, this meandering led your undeserving servant to distraction and annoyance. I find myself hesitant to read the next and last in this series.
Bloody Red Baron by Kim NewmanCarroll & Graf1995
Bloody Red Baron on Amazon

The Enterprise of Death by Jesse BullingtonAfter having read The Sad Tale of the Brothers Grossbart and love love loving it, imagine my delight in finding that Bullington had published another book this very year. The Enterprise of Death is a parable on how tricky it can be to rise above the circumstances from which we emerge. In the case of our heroine, Awa, those circumstances are rather dire. Awa is a former slave who, along with her mistress, is waylaid by a cruel necromancer shopping for a rather rare sort of successor. The kind of successor who, if they learned their true fate, would not go willingly. The good news, if it could be called good, is that Awa learns how to be a passable necromancer. We witness her horrific training, and follow her later adventures. As in the Brothers, the violence is hyper-photographically brutal, the sexy bits are graphic and never kink-free, and the main characters are caught in machinations that remain mostly beyond their ken. There is a scene late in the book where Awa is magically granted greater intelligence and she is stunned to look back and see how stupid she’s been. For years. My gripes: The ending does not ring true to these ears, and the Bullington’s carefully measured language is suddenly peppered with frank explicit sexual vocabulary starting at about one third of the way through the book, and I found it distracting. Still, The Enterprise of Death is an entertaining read. Those who are not entertained will be offended, and the Hyena wins my award for the most horrific monster of the year.
The Enterprise of Death by Jesse BullingtonOrbit Books2011.
The Enterprise of Death on Amazon

Blameless by Gail CarrigerHa ha ho ho hee hee is it awkward explaining to all my friends that I’m not just reading these thinly veiled vampire/werewolf romance novels, but that I think they’re fantastic. See my review of the first, here. Yes. Yes I’ve read all of them now. They are in order, after Soulless: Changeless, Blameless, and Heartless. Another, Timeless, is due March 2012. Gail Carriger continues the fascinating adventures of Alexia Tarabotti as she thwarts enemies, spouts wry observations, and dodges multiple assassination attempts by various nefarious 19th Century organizations, all while keeping appearances and providing proper guidance on manners. I spent a lot of time thinking about this, and found one nit to pick with these books: The covers are not getting better, and they really need to get somebody working on that. Everything else is grand. The books are an easy read and hard to put down. New York Times Bestselling. Still not ready to take the plunge? Just repeat after me: Low-brow is high-brow. Low-brow is high-brow. Low-brow is high-brow. There’s no place like home.
Changeless, Blameless, and Heartless by Gail Carriger2010, 2010, 2011Orbit Books
Check it out! The first 3 books available CHEAP for the Kindle.

Book Review: The Sad Tale of the Brothers Grossbart by Jesse Bullington

the sad tale of the brothers grossbart by jesse bullingtonThe title reads “The Sad Tale of Brothers Grossbart” but the book reveals itself to be half comedy, half tragedy. You can discern as much by reading the headline on the back: “We ain’t thieves and we ain’t killers, we’s just good men been done wrong.”

And so goes the malevolent stupidity of the grave robbing pair. See: grave robbing isn’t wrong if it’s your family trade. Right? The brothers would agree. They would also add that they only throttled your ma because she was making too much noise (and she started it first). Although the tongue is placed firmly in cheek, it should be noted that this book is probably not for everyone. It even has the courtesy to provide a gatekeeper in the form of an atrocity, five pages in, where the brothers carelessly slaughter the wife and children of a turnip farmer. “Abandon all Hope Ye Who Enter Here.” Setting the tone for the rest of the book, the violence in this scene is frank and anatomically descriptive.

The more sensitive readers may be right to put the book down. The rest of us will later begin to see slapstick in the many hyper-photographically detailed bodily insults recorded here. The brothers make enemies as naturally as we breathe air, and a large subplot of the book involves the vengeful people, witches, and supernatural beings on the trail of the Grossbarts. The Grossbarts themselves are focused on getting to Egypt, because they’ve heard many a tale of the fantastical graves there. Being grave robbers and all, they take a professional interest.

Plot-wise, the book reads very much like the adventures of Sinbad the Sailor as chronicled in the Book of the Thousand Nights and One Night. That is to say that the protagonists become tangled in machinations that are vastly greater than they are. The brothers manage to stumble through by the light of their own convictions, no matter how misplaced those convictions may be. In the Brothers Grossbart, this provides endless opportunities for dire humor. And at times these awful, stinking, disgusting, ugly, and appallingly stupid and violent men approach likability. I was also reminded of Grimm’s Fairy Tales (tragedy set in mythical surroundings), Tim Powers The Anubis Gates (historical hilarity and accretion of painful injuries), and James Branch Cabell’s Jurgen (a comedy that is not really about what it purports to contain).

I would be wrong to talk about this book without mentioning the masterful grasp that Bullington has on the English language. The language is used like a fine tool to disgust, appall, frighten, or even describe beauty. Upon entering Venice: “True to its visage, the sky let them advance only a short distance before a deluge crashed down on them.” The brothers and unfortunate henchmen are approached by three long dead, rotting men who are animated by demons: “The stench overpowered them, even the Grossbarts gagging on the suddenly wet air.”

Creepy Factor: 4 out of 5
Suspense Factor: 2 out of 5
Weird Erotic Tension Factor: 2 out of 5
Funny and/or Strange Factor: 5 out of 5

Final result: It is not wrong to want to murder the Brothers Grossbart. What a great book.

The Sad Tale of the Brothers Grossbart by Jesse Bullington2009Orbit

Buy The Sad Tale of the Brothers Grossbart now at Amazon

Book Review: Knuckle Supper by Drew Stepek

Knuckle Supper opens on a scene where a pair of drug-dealing Los Angeles vampires are killing a pimp in their house. They lock his twelve year old prostitute in the bathroom and kill him with an massive overdose of heroin. Then they pull his arms off, snap one finger off of each, and drink the blood from the pimp’s arms via the knuckle, in a way that I imagine might be like drinking from a bong – or something. The heroin in the veins of the now-dead pimp gets them high. During the entire scene, the vampires squabble like a stereotypical pair of junkies (a la Sid and Nancy). It is mentioned that this vampire drug-running gang call themselves “Knucklers” after this method of getting high. Later the head vampire, RJ, decides to take the young prostitute under his wing, and chaos erupts. Or maybe I should say that more chaos erupts.

Obviously, this is just a summary of the first few pages of the book, but to cut to the chase, if what I just described to you sounds interesting, then you might want to check out Knuckle Supper. Knuckle Supper by Drew Stepek is what I like to call a “shit sandwich.” Don’t get me wrong – saying that something is a shit sandwich isn’t in and of itself a bad thing. There are any number of great pieces of literature that are shit sandwiches. Take The Bungler by Patricia Highsmith for example, or basically all of the good output of James M. Cain or Jim Thompson. Shit sandwiches are books where shitty people do shitty things to other shitty people (and themselves) and eventually things turn out more shitty or less shitty, but usually more shitty. These novels very often include drug use and/or dysfunctional love affairs. Not to get all literate on everybody, but I classify The Sheltering Sky by Paul Bowles as the big daddy shit sandwich of all time, at least in book form. That was one big stinky, bad-tasting crap-fest camouflaged as a falafel sandwich or something.

I’m trying to come up with some shit sandwiches in the horror genre. The best I can do right now is The Cipher by Kathe Koja and Peter Straub’s If You Could See Me Now. These are both amazing books.

At best, shit sandwiches make us care about the people in them and maybe shine a light on what it means to be human. The main peril of a shit sandwich is that the reader can get alienated, annoyed, or decide that they simply don’t care about the shitty people or what shit happens to them, and the shit they are doing. I think that this ends up being one of the biggest problems with Knuckle Supper. By the end, I had stopped caring about all of the shitty people in it.

If I had to describe this book by comparing it to some others, I would say “Imagine The Basketball Diaries meets Sid and Nancy but with homicidal drug-dealing post-punk vampires in LA.” Indeed, like the first, there are drug-motivated capers that end badly. Like the second, there is a lot of drug-motivated squabbling that can be amusing. There is some humor. There is a lot of graphic violence. Even more potty humor. Some annoying people get offed. Our protagonists swirl down the drain in a spiral of bad decisions, compulsive behavior, and self-sabotage. There are many sub-plots:

  1. Our hero, RJ, happens upon a large bag of heroin while killing some crooked cops and decides to deal it himself instead of turning it over to the kingpin vampire of LA.
  2. RJ decides to take in the young prostitute with the idea that he is going to rescue her.
  3. Although he didn’t really go looking for it, RJ finds out where came from.
  4. RJ and another head vampire are forced by a band of rogue Catholic priests to kill a band of transvestite prostitute vampires.

Here is where I run down what kind of vampires we’re talking about here:

  • Good Looking: No
  • Superhuman strength: Yes
  • Changeling: No
  • Sparkles: No
  • Erotic neck biting: No
  • Drink blood: Yes
  • Can turn victims into more vampires: No
  • Must be killed by decapitation or stake through the heart: Yes
  • Reflection in mirrors: Yes
  • Scared of crosses and/or garlic: No
  • Burn in sunlight: Yes
  • Goth nightclub visit: Yes

Ah! I love classifying vampires. Regular readers will note that there is no weird eroticism in this book and will know that I am always disappointed when this is the case. Sigh. A vampire without the sexy might as well be a giant mosquito. I mean really!

By now you’re all like “OK OK already. Did you like it?” I kind of did and kind of didn’t. It was different. Let us see the numbers, shall we?

Creepy Factor: 2 out of 5
Suspense Factor: 2 out of 5
Weird Erotic Tension Factor: -1 out of 5 (yes: repulsive)
Funny and/or Strange Factor: 4 out of 5

Final result: It’s complicated. I thought Knuckle Supper was one of the most purposefully offensive books I’ve read recently, and after a while a monster gets tired of it, and the shit all gets kind of meaningless. There were some good things. There were some annoying things. Some of the violent stuff didn’t make sense, like sometimes it didn’t seem physically possible. Like for example draining the blood from a severed arm through a finger knuckle. Like I said above, it was different. I think a lot of people will be glad to be reading vampire fiction where the vampires are actually monstrous. Different tends to be good, but I was left feeling only lukewarm about the book.

Knuckle Supper by Drew Stepek – Alphar Publishing – 2010
Order KNUCKLE SUPPER today on Amazon.

The flying monkeys let our technician out for a minute and he snuck away into the light of day. Thanks for your patience during this difficult transition.
I ated Tinkerbell.

Fhtagn Spoken Here.

... the attic, a vast raftered length lighted only by small blinking windows in the gable ends, and filled with a massed wreckage of chests, chairs, and spinning-wheels which infinite years of deposit had shrouded and festooned into monstrous and hellish shapes.
The Shunned House
H.P. Lovecraft




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